guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
