she was so not down for the gang bang
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
then he tried to convert me to islam
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
I love you.
Bad choice
Randomize
