DUDE. I'm missing my big toenail. My bed has blood all over it. WHAT DID WE DO LAST NIGHT?
I don't know, but I chipped my tooth and I'm wearing different underwear.
Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
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