So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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