My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
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