im at the bar and i misjudged a fart...go home or ride the night out?Never mind, the bouncer made the decision for me...be home soon
Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
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