he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
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