U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
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