How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
Randomize
