he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
smell my finger.
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
is that a dick in a sweater?
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
