yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
I'm on my "fiiiiirrrst" glass of wine- the quotes mean it's the last of the bottle- so I really need you to pick up your phone so we can talk about this
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
The Olympian is in my bed
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
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