Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
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