this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
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he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
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We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
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