i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
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