so i texed my mom when i was trashed last night and said "i know its 3 am, just go to bed and i'll be back by the time we leave for the airport"
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
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Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
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Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
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