i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
