i barfeds in our rink
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
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