she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
Randomize
