Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
