Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
Everclear isn't food dammit
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
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