I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Randomize
