walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
Randomize