i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
I'm bleeding and have questions
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
Randomize
