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Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
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