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• (919): View more from North Carolina

  so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.

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• (765): View more from Indiana

  yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.

  (1-765): View more from Indiana

  yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.

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• (417): View more from Missouri

  oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler

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• (320): View more from Minnesota

  so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..

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• 

  23 Strangest Things That Gave Dudes A Boner

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.

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• (352): View more from Florida

  homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...

  (1-352): View more from Florida

  so you did it...

  (352): View more from Florida

  obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.

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• (206): View more from Washington

  She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.

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• (423): View more from Tennessee

  I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake

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• (303): View more from Colorado

  I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.

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  These 21 People Shouldn’t Be Giving Dating Advice

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• (916): View more from California

  the gays at disneyland are vicious

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• (818): View more from California

  The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.

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• (301): View more from Maryland

  Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done

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• (561): View more from Florida

  He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."

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• (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?

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• (720): View more from Colorado

  Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.

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