It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
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