I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
it was like having sex with a tree stump
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
Randomize