Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
Randomize
