oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
Randomize