He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
I'm too hungover for some lady to talk to me about potatoes
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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