i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
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