it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize
