so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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