He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize