i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
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