We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
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