He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
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