was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
Randomize