How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
She told me I should be a condom model.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
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