How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
Randomize
