I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
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