I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
21 People Reveal The Most Embarrassing Secrets They Know About Someone
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life