I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house