I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
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