It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
You're earring is so big in my mouth
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
I need a burrito and a hug.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
