This is not my ceiling
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
all but 2 of were put on probation for disorderly conduct. i know, visiting a hospital when your drunk is really stupid but it seemed like such a good idea at the time
swear to god, "it seemed like a good idea at the time" is gonna be on your epitaph
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
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