He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
Your penis caused this!
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Randomize
