Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
Randomize