I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
Randomize
