3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
I just found puke in my bra..
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
Everyone I slept with in 2016 is getting a Christmas card from me. Because I'm an adult.
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