if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
everytime i eat a fruit i feel like i'm eating ovaries
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
The best revenge is premature balding
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
Randomize
