doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
It was confusing and full of hummus
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
Randomize
